Anniversary

Darklin and I have no idea what our actual first date was, but it was around April 1st, so being the fools we are, we adopted April Fool's Day as our official anniversary date.

For those interested, here's the story:

I was neck deep in recovering from the Texas Debacle, which led me to briefly date a cross-dresser who was prettier than me. I broke up with the cross dresser after a few months of knowing that this wasn't going *anywhere* (Valentine's Day - I'm such a bitch!) We worked together, which didn't complicate things very much. We became pretty good friends, though we've since lost touch.

Right around the time I was coming to the conclusion that things with the Cross Dresser were not going to work out (I had the flu, for example, and was on my death bed, and he complained that I wasn't looking polished enough. Oy.) I started to correspond with a poet in Ottawa who was terribly depressive and terribly married. Oh, what a disaster. So I went looking for a fuck buddy. (Aren't I classy?)

I met Darklin online in March of 2004 on Match.Com through a series of interested coincidences. He had me in his 'favourites folder' for several weeks, but thought I was out of his league. I had him in mine but didn't have a paid account, so couldn't do anything but sigh over how cute I thought he was. A friend lent me his credit card (thanks Paul, you cupid, you!) and I wrote to Darklin. We chatted for a while, and agreed to meet for coffee sometime around April 1st.

We had a few unremarkable coffee dates. I nicknamed him CD (for coffee date) and wrote long and hilarious blogs about the adventure that was dating post-Texas and post-Cross Dresser. It was really meant to be fun, you know? I just wanted to get laid now and then...maybe have someone to go to the movies with now and then. But the chemistry wasn't there. At all.

I was about to throw in the towel when oh my god! Zing! Zing happened like a bolt out of the blue and I went from whining that this guy was just not for me - atheist, ball cap wearing, hockey fanatic, pot smoking, shorter than me, no chemistry, news junkie, just not that interesting, frankly, etc. etc - to OMG! ZING! Hello! We have zing!

Twenty minutes of necking in a movie theatre parking lot kind of zing.

I was living in Guelph at the time, but working in Kitchener, which was a big pain the ass because I don't drive. Carpooling was costing me a fortune, so I was looking for a place in Kitchener...which was a big pain in the ass because I don't drive. Over messenger one day, Darklin suggested I come stay with him for a few weeks so I could look for a place. "Just 'till you get settled" he said. I found out later that he had fallen head over heels and figured once he got me all moved in, I'd maybe never leave.

June 2004, I moved in.

And the rest is history.

We fell in love by slow degrees, and by 'love' I mean that he knows me like the back of his hand, and I know him like the back of my hand, and we like one another, and share space well together, and are honest with one another to an astonishing degree. We respect each other, and we want the other to evolve in our own good time. We co-parent together. We run the household magnificently well together.

It didn't start as an all consuming passion. It started as a lark. It didn't lead into all consuming passion. It led to something very calm, something like a tree, which might not impress one at first glance, which might not be as pretty or ethereal as a flower, which might just stand there like a tree does ... until you consider the miles and miles of root system beneath the trunk, and then stand there in utter fucking awe at the subtle and lasting beauty of the thing.

My love is a tree.

***

We're going out for dinner tonight, and then we're coming home early so he can join his World of Warcraft buddies in a raid (chortles!!).